ये बात अभी ख़तम हुई नही

ये बात अभी ख़तम हुई नही
ये रात तेरी सनम हुई नही

उन आखों में आज भी नमी थी
उनमे आज भी मेरी कमी थी

मैं अड़ी तो बड़ा अपनी बात पर
पर रुक ना सकी उस जज़्बात पर

वो एहसास आज भी बरकरार था
उस दबी हसी में आज भी इज़हार था

उस चश्मे के पीछे छुपाना तो था एहसास को
लेकिन फिर मिलने क्यूँ आए अपनी ख़ास को?

ये बात अभी ख़तम हुई नही
ये रात तेरी सनम हुई नही 

Sorry prosperity!

You looked so sweet as ever
your eyes were shy
your hands sweating
your coat so neat
your red shirt well ironed
I like the way you smiled
your demeanor was calm
you must be having an upheaval
but you still had that charm..
I felt really guilty
I felt really bad
wanted to make things fine
but not when I myself am sad
you deserve a happy partner
you're a happy soul
but excuse my confidence
for 'good hearts' play no role.

My shit gotta be real
my shit gotta have insight
my shit will touch my soul
& all the wrongs will be right!

Come back!!

So hard to hold back my tears
Two seconds pass like two years
I can't see straight it's dark & grey
It's hookah smoke and no words to say
Come back please Glueck, hold me tight
My days are bleak & it's scary by the night 

As she may..

She knew she's good
She knew she could bake
But for the love of God
CA was her only make

They told her it's right
They told her it's class
She agreed for the love
She just had to pass

She gave it her best
She gave it her age
She tried for the love
Continued without rage

She did it day & night
She swallowed all those books
While all friends that she had
cared for parties & good looks

Once in while she ditched
She did what her heart said
Once in while she baked
For this secret love was unread

They did care for study
But then they saw, they tasted, they believed
She was trying hard for the love
But the love was here indeed

They believed in her
more than she could
They smashed the society
For their love touch wood

She flies now like a free bird
She swings and dances and sways away
For this is just the begging
And she can live as she may..

I slide into your shoe

I slide into your shoe!

I am with you!
I slide into your shoe..

You may feel cheated
you too walk away
You may cry by yourself
You couldn't say

You stay busy & busy
& then happy again
You hide your feel
You hide the pain

But I am with you!
I slide into your shoe

We meet no more
You talk very less
You may get angry
& think what a mess

You may check on me
And see a happy soul
You think what a bitch
with a nasty goal

But I am with you!
I slide into your shoe

You may smoke it out
And relieve all the rage
You may hate me more
And think we're on the same page

You may talk to family
You may say she wasn't worth
You set out on a journey
& find someone with a dearth

But I am with you!
I slide into your shoe

You may laugh at parties
And act so cool
They'll think you're good
They'll think you rule

You wear your glasses
You mask it good
You hate me more
And you fight like a dude

But I am with you!
I slide into your shoe

I reacted too wrong
I thought I didn't care
But your voice was still deep
Your conviction very rare

Now you may as well act
You may never come back
But my guilt will stay
Though it wasn't an attack

You will be what you were
M sure you'll live again
You as it is want a deal
& minus Sohani wont even pain

I feel it and m sorry
For it was sudden & bizarre
But I pray you will be happy
with your deal & with no scar

Because I am with you!
I slide into your shoe

(im)PERFECT WORLDS

Everything was perfect.
Perfect two worlds.

Auckland was a modern life form
while Delhi was vintage and warm.

Auckland was classy easy dove
while Delhi had all the love.

Auckland was sweet innocent talky
while Delhi was oh so rocky.

Auckland was smiling immense
while Delhi was feelings and sense.

Auckland would bend and flattered
while Delhi was all that mattered.

Auckland was white and pretty
while Delhi was her own city.

Everything was perfect.
Perfect two worlds.

She tried to fit in Auckland
while her heart was in homeland.

She tried to listen to all of them
while her heart knitted its own hem.

She split herself and did it all.
She agreed to glory and took a call.
Auckland was cheated and
Delhi smashed her away
For she was neither home
nor far away.

She pleaded and cried and begged all around.
neither Auckland nor Delhi heard her sound.

She hated perfection
hated perfect worlds
for her peace was found
in her grievances unfurled

She now lives in disdain
yet content in her shelter
where she chooses imperfection
where nobody has felt her..

We wear different lenses!

Of times and again
that he can't see
I see a match
that just can't be

he sees through the loop
he seeks for a deal
while I seek love
that can't just appeal

he sees through ambition
he sees the crisp voice
while I am all soft
around me is all noise

of times and again
he gets a good heart
well that exactly oh dear
will rip us apart

his vision is clear
his point to straight
while I wait for the doubts
& true love on a date

his check list is done
his duty fulfilled
he may marry a puppet
for feelings will be killed

Why do I hear none of what he says?
Why do my eyes don't see what he shows?
And why do I, still my dear, get prosperous every time?
Let the blinding be done.. and the glasses be worn
as all I see is red reprinting my greens..

Let the hue of red
that belongs to you instead
and the hack of black
that stays on your shack
come to me every night
and paint my greens till the morning light..

For that's when I wear your lenses!
For that's when I wear your lenses!

"To be or not to be"

"To be or not to be" - Thank you Shakespeare for giving this dilemma to us..
So here are I am, strangling with the same word I was so confident about back in 2012.. One of my first posts..
Its been five years and all I could do in all this while is talking a step back.. no wait.. taking a million steps back and yet none.
The confidence is gone and I can see myself getting into the cobwebs of Maryada set by my dear own society...
The society set by my own people.. my mummy ji, my papa ji, my brothers, my friends forever.. The list is never ending..
Where am I to go, if none support my Maryada? What am I to do, if what I want to do involves them.. all of them..
Shall I be a rebel? Boycott the society and flee?? But for whom? For inner peace?
May be being in my own blanket, sipping coffee and just writing a blog is more convenient..
I may die a million times.. but in a cosy warm blanket only to wake up to a happy sunny day..

Maryada.. Hah.. I thought I'd set one for myself.. No baby, they set it right.. They know how to CULTIVATE.. they know how to TAME.. after all, it's apt to train and tame wild ones.. Oh yes they call me wild.. all of them..

Am I wild?? I was just taking my own sweet time... I was just listening to my heart..
But here you go society.. I give up.. For I am not wild! If I am anything.. then that's just one of the many.. one of the many millions.. who die a million times, yet live it up.. live it up to you..
Happy 2017! YOU WIN!

एक पल

ये कैसा एक पल हुआ

जो होके भी ना हुआ

एक एहसास रूहानी सा, सुहानी सा

ये हवा, ये फ़िज़ा

जो मुझे चूमते ही करवट बदल गयी

यूँ समुद्र में उठती हुई लहरे

जो मेरे करीब आते ही ठहर गयी

एक बरसात जो भीगा ना सकी

एक रात जो आ ना सकी

टहनी से निकला हुआ वो पत्ता

जो उड़ान भरते ही रेत पे आ गिरा

यूँ मिलो फैली रेत

जो हथेली में आते ही फ़िसल गयी

ये कैसा एक पल हुआ

जो होके भी ना हुआ

धडकने तेज़ हुई

और रूह काँप उठी

जो ये एहसास हुआ

प्राकृत तेरा राज़दार हुआ

यूँ फ़िज़ाओं का मुड़ना

यूँ ल़हेरो का थमना

ये तो तेरी फ़ितरत है जानम

जो बरसात तरसा के चली गयी

जो रात चिढ़ा के ढाल गयी

ये तो तेरी हरकत है जानम

तू आज फ़िर आके चला गया

मेरी आखों में आँसू और लाबो पे हसी देके चला गया

जो होके भी ना हुआ,

एसा एक पल देके चला गया |